Sometimes I turn onto a Christian radio show and have an immediate sense of…well concern with the attitude of confidence I hear. The word opine seems to fit, although I’m not really sure why.
Maybe it’s because the host comes across as having all the ducks lined up in a row, an expression that always applies to fake ducks, and I know that the real ducks would never consent so easily.
I hear certainty, conviction, doctrine, steadfastness, and to be honest, sometimes I just don’t really want to. Sometimes I want to hear doubt and question, because that’s what I have.
If you are outspoken on the radio, shouldn’t you be direct, assured, persuasive, without doubt? Aren’t the models found in the Prophets and the Scriptures? Aren’t the examples Paul, and Moses, and James, and John. And Jesus? Of course.
My concerns at those times don’t really reflect, I suppose on the speaker, as much as myself. Maybe it’s understandably irrational, maybe it’s unjustifiable, but it is there.
Usually my reaction comes at a time of doubt, a crisis of faith if you will, which most of us have at times. Jesus had his.
When I am in that place, and I listen to those speakers, my reaction is “Why don’t I have that certainty? Why don’t I have that comfort? Why is there sand sinking beneath my feet when there should be rock?”
It makes me wonder if those speakers have ever gone through those crises, those discomforts, and those skepticisms. And of course, I know that they must have. But I hardly ever hear them talk about it.